Today my husband and I have been married for 4 years; it’s our anniversary!
4 years ago at this time I was taking photos with my fiancé and my bridal party, and wishing that we had planned the ceremony for earlier in the day so that we could already be married and riding off into the sunset. 4 years ago at this time I was filled with hope and expectation of what married bliss would be like. And I think my personally written vows probably reflected that. 4 years later, do they still stand up? I think so. I made many good promises (including baking him pies, which I never do), promises that have acted as an anchor over these last 4 years and reminded me of what I signed up for. Promises that, even if a little naive, really are the things I hope to be and still aspire to, as a wife and a partner.
But, if I wrote my vows today, I think they might look a little different…
I promise not to take your phone to google something without telling you what I’m googling first.
I promise to let you have all the pizza leftovers.
I promise to be patient with you as we both figure out our roles as parents.
I promise to stop expecting you to put your clothes in the hamper, and just get over how annoying it is when they’re directly beside the hamper.
I promise to stay invested in the success of our marriage, and not put any friendship or other family before our relationship.
I promise to learn how to fight better.
I promise to stop threatening to sleep on the couch / make you sleep on the couch, because we both know it’ll never happen.
I promise to stop looking for your short comings as a man and husband, and focus on your many strengths and gifts.
I promise to not watch our show on Netflix without you.
I promise to not secretly watch our show on Netflix without you and then go back to previous episodes hoping you won’t find out.
I promise to get you a coke at the store even when you say you don’t want anything.
I promise to pray for your more and criticize you less.
I promise to rub your shoulders more and stop tickling you or trying to sit on your lap, cause I know you hate it.
I promise to not take pictures of you for the internet without your consent.
I promise to always be your best friend, even when sometimes hanging out gets a little boring.
I promise to tell our kids how amazing their father is, and how he’s everything I hoped he would be as a dad.
I promise to not put my cold feet on your feet anymore in bed.
I promise to remember who you were, who you are, and to love who you are becoming.
I promise to get better with age.
I promise to tell you that you’re getting hotter as you get older.
I promise to give my all, to not worry if I’m getting back what I put in, and to love you unreservedly – and to learn what that really means together.
Happy anniversary to my husband, the kindest man I know. You really are making all my dreams come true, and I’m so grateful.
p.s. If you’re looking for something fun to do with your spouse tonight, why not play a little game and see who can remember the most of their vows! Winner gets a foot rub!